Valentine's Day surprise

Here's a pic of what I woke up to:













Chris is so sweet!!!

My photo sharing page has been updated (you need to have a login to see my pix)

http://flickr.com/photos/theanykey

How's life?

-B

My Valentine's Day

Chris woke me up at about 7 a.m. this morning, and told to come upstairs. He had already run back upstairs by the time I was dressed, and so I opened the bedroom door to find a trail of Hershey's Kisses leading through the hallway, up the stairs, and into the kitchen.

As I came up the stairs, I saw Chris sitting at the kitchen table, smiling.

I went into the kitchen, and saw what Chris had set up: A big white teddy bear holding a red heart pillow, a heart shaped pillow covered in red hearts on a black background, a square pillow with pink hearts on a red background, and each corner has a little pom pom on it! (Oh, these pillows are incredibly soft!!!)

There was a BEAUTIFUL card leaning up against the teddy bear. And everything was candlelit: on the left hand side in front of the teddy bears was one tall pillar candle, and one smaller pillar candle, both 'romance' scented, on square glass plate candle holders. There was a lead crystal goblet style candle holder filled with more Kisses on the right. Just centered from those, was 6 votive candles that came in glass holders, 3 on each side of another Kiss.

That was my Valentine's Day present from him!!!

We had a great day, too. We drove to Glendon to have tarot and palm readings done, and Pat (The psychic) got a lot of things right about each of our 'past's'. We learned a lot from her, of what we may or may not be able to expect, and so we will probably forget all about it until a few years from now, when we'll find the papers we wrote stuff down on. Then we will see how accurate her predictions were!!!

Some of it was cooler than other parts, but for the most part, was good!

I have pics of the above gifts set up, and will post them when I have time...

:)

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Yay!!!

After a few days of pain and swelling, Patches is doing tremendously better.

Unfortunately, until his sutures are removed, and probably after for a few days, we still have to carry him up and down steps to make sure he doesn't tear his wound, or bleed, or anything else. I am sure he feels like he is being punished, because not only have we not been letting him sleep up on beds, for fear he will jump off and hurt himself, we are feeding him MUCH LESS human food, and the stuff we give him is meat, lean of course.

Even when he tries to tell me he is okay with chocolate, I still won't give it to him...

And the little porker also tried to convince me he didn't get fed this morning. ( Dad gives him his morning pill(s) and feeds him his morning and evening meals, so that we can accurately keep track of how much food he eats ( he is a little overweight... for his mix of breed) and he sat by his food dish and kind of looked at me then at the dish, and back at me, as if to say, hey, Dad disn't feed me, so you better...)

For the record, I checked his pills (I marked his twice daily antibiotics with the date and a.m. and p.m. respectively, so that we could make sure he doesn't miss any... just in case!), and I figured if he got his pill, there is no way Dad didn't feed him.

So I cuddled him instead.

I am not sure that made a difference in his appetite!

* * * * *

In other news, we are now settled in M&D's basement...

...awaiting and continuing to search for jobs...

and I am actively trying to get my health back into a more, well, healthy range.

I have an appointment to talk to a dietician, and a therapist... just to deal with random life crap, help figure out my mental blocks, you know?

* * * * *

Thanks to everyone who found their way here from Illustration Friday (or otherwise) and who commented on my last post, and wished Patches a speedy recovery. With all the people thinking of him, he has recovered spedily, but, not quite done yet. On the 13th, sutures come out, and I am sure he will not be a happy puppy after that.

I use the term 'puppy' loosely, considering Patches will be 6 on April 7th!!!

* * * * *

I find I have been thinking about Pookie a lot in the past few weeks. The thoughts come and go, bittersweet memories that bring tears to my eyes.

(Anyone who missed the back ground on Pookie - a.k.a. 'Boo', click here to read more.)

It is starting to feel weird how well we've all adjusted to life without her, although I am certain she is on our minds often. We still have the toy dog she treated like a baby when she was in heat, and would chew in between cycles, and her collar on it. Together, they sit atop the t.v. in the living room, where I am sure we all glance at it from time to time and pause to remember her.

Sigh. :) I can't wait to see her again. She was so good!

Anyway, I am tired, and have a nasty hedache, and am going to try to sleep! I can't believe how late it is! Crap! I will have to get up early and suck it up through tomorrow...

Moi.

I miss Patches

This morning, I had to drop off my [parents'] little dull-black coloured fur ball to the v-e-t to get knocked out.

He had to have an x-ray taken of his bladder, because we noticed he has had blood in his urine the last few weeks. The last few weeks consisted of the following: The v-e-t gave him antibiotics but they didn't do anything, or at least nothing to fix the real problem: he had a stone in his bladder. They used a sample of his urine (another story) to determine that this was the issue, by doing a urinalysis to see if there was crystals in it. Then they informed us our options:

1) try to do a regular x-ray while Patches is awake, to try to see if there was stones in his bladder or not;
2) anesthetize Patches, inject air into his bladder, x-ray. The air would show up dark on an x-ray, and make it easier to distinguish between the white-appearing stones, and normally white appearing organs.

Since if we were to go with option #1, and it didn't show anything, we would have to go to step #2 to ensure there wasn't anything, we skipped #1, and (easily) arranged it so that if they did indeed find the stones, they would call me and let me know, before just going right into surgery. They did call, and let me know that they found a large stone, and that they would be taking it out soon.

While I had the v-e-t/s-u-r-g-e-o-n on the phone, I also asked when I could take him home, and what other steps would be required to prevent another one from forming. (It was obviously diet- related, and when I called at 5:30 to see how he was doing, they asked me all sorts of questions about his diet, food intake, treats, etc). I was informed that we should be cutting back on the amount of treats we give him, and also NO MORE HUMAN FOOD!!!

Anyone who has ever been in our house has undoubtedly noticed the two beady eyes that stare up at you if you are eating, or are in the general vicinity of the kitchen. Mostly, it will be hard for us to not feed him extra food, because the steroids he is on for previous breathing-related problems makes him hungry. Knowing that alone makes it difficult not to give him small pieces of meat... cheese... bread... veggies... okay, okay, anything we happen to be eating, including very rarely, a small bit of chocolate.

Yeah, so to fast-forward to today: Patches ended up having surgery to remove the stone, and I can't pick him up until tomorrow afternoon.

I wish animals didn't have to go through this crap. They just don't understand why they have to go to the "evil" vet who knocks them out and makes them hurt when they wake up...

I wish I could feel the pain instead of him having to. At least they would give me meds for it if needed. For Patches, it must be like being tortured.
I know it is the best thing for him, to get the surgery done, but still. He doesn't know and understand that. I think he thinks we are doing this to him because he was bad or something.

I will feel better when i see him tomorrow.

:-)

-B

Oh, and we are out of our house in the south... got full dd back!! yay, pay bills...

I have 3 webblogs

http://itmakessense2me.blogspot.com/

This site is basically all about my religious beliefs.

So, yeah.

I probably won't update it as much as this one, but it's something different.

I have always wanted to own a business that I would call "Something Different".

Yeah. For those who don't yet know about it, I made a site I intend to hopefully use to update everyone on the anticipated two weddings that are currently being planned...

If anyone has any information I don't have yet, that I am allowed to post, please email me.

Here's that site's addy:

http://bridesandgrooms.blogspot.com/

Gotta go. :)

I have updated my Flickr.com page

If anyone ever feels like it, you can check my pics @

http://www.flickr.com/photos/theanykey

To see any of the new ones, or good ones, you have to have a sign in. The majority of my pictures have restricted access to my friends and family.

The link for my photo page is always on this page, somewhere on the right side--->.

Oh, here's a few pix for here, of my new haircut...


And, before you ask, if anyone would have, I didn't get it done at a salon. I actually did it myself.

More out of necessity than anything else, I started just trimming the ends, because they were irrepairably dry. Then, it just became a battle of evening it out, and trimming more because I didn't like the length.

Chris had to help me finish straightening it, especially in the back, because I couldn't take trying anymore!

Besides, if I'd have screwed it up much more, it would have been even shorter!

Here's another pic:


Me, and the greatest guy in the world!

He made me promise he wouldn't have to help when I told him I was going to trim my hair, and then he caved when I begged him to fix it for me... :)

Such a sweetie! He was even really nice about having to cut my hair. He started to ask questions like: "So, how was your day? What have you been up to lately?" just like a real hair dresser! Except he showed a lot more interest than most of my hairdressers ever have.

We ended up having a lot of fun, and we both like my hair like this, so it turned out to be a pretty good day!

And, one more, just for the heckuvit!


This one, I edited in Microsoft Paint, to get rid of the red sores I have all over my face.

You can kind of see them in the picture with Chris, above, but the flash nearly made them invisible!

I need to go talk to the Doctor about them, it's folliculitus, flaring up again. I had it about 5-6 years ago.

More emotionally scarring and self-esteem crushing than anything else.

<--- Notice I am smiling! I am happy.

: )

And to all a goodnight!

Don't forget to vote!

-B

Had two, now none.

Am jobless again. Got a call from the higher paying job the day before s'posed to start at coffee loving place, and called to inform them I would not be working there, that I had gotten another opportunity.

Got picked up this a.m., after very little sleep, and after a scary ride out to Wold Lake (I was the only person out of the 5 in the truck who wore a seat belt, driver was speeding, driving dangerously, distractedly), sat around awaiting the foremans availability to fill out the hire pack. During this time, I had to fight off anxiety symptoms, and when we finally started to go through the paperwork, they got worse.

After a few minutes of me trying to concentrate, it became uncontrollable, and I felt the overwhelming symptoms: nausea, cramps, claustrophobia(esp. with clothes near my neck), dry mouth, etc. The foreman asked if I had not gotten enough sleep the night before, and I replied yes, and that I have anxiety issues. I then asked where the washroom wsa, and he went outside and pointed it out to me. When I finally returned, the foreman's boss was awaiting to talk to me, and seemingly had already made up his mind about what was going to happen.

He asked some questions, most of them implying that there was no way he would let me work there after this, and after "we" came to the decision it wasn't going to work out, told me to go wait in the coffee trailer, while they arrange for a ride home for me.

I then got a ride from an older guy, who was very nice, polite, understanding and best of all a responsible driver.

All in all, I was gone from the house for 4 hours. Saw LOTS of wildlife.

On the way there, with the reckless driver, a huge buck ran across the road in front of the truck, which the driver thankfully noticed and slowed down for a bit afterwards.

On the safer ride back, I saw a cute little red fox in the ditch, cleaning itself. It was about the size of a small cat, but with a huge tail.

I then saw what appeared to be 3 deer in a field, running away from the road, but I don't think they were deer. They ran like deer, but were very dark in color. (It was daylight, so I could see clearly). Antelope maybe?

And then, I saw a different type of fox, reddish brown with a patch of white at the tip of it's tail. It was bigger too, but not much.

So, I guess there was good and bad today. Out towards Wolf Lake, there is a lot of trees, and this morning, they had 'hoar frost' on them, and then it started to snow. So the drive back home was pretty peaceful, and somewhat relaxing. I got nervous as we got closer to my house, because I knew I would have to tell Chris, and I felt embarrassed enough.

Thankfully, he is very understanding, and I love him for it.

So, back out tomorrow, maybe go back to coffee heaven, etc.

Oh, and my hair is short now... about shoulder length. I will try to upload a pic to post here.

There is just one more thing I feel the need to say, even though I can't say it aloud. I feel embarrassed that this didn't work out. I know that I am in debt, and that this would have been a great way to start getting out of it. I know that I have a 'medical problem' that apparently isn't going to go away, with or without pills. I just feel so alone, when this stuff happens.

I feel like I let my family down. They get all excited for (and proud of) me when I get a job like this, and then something like this happens. I just feel like they are disappointed in me.

I just feel like no one understands. Like I am characterized by my anxiety. Like no one believes I will succeed as long as I have these issues, that if I don't go to the doctor(s), I can never work through it.

So, yeah. I am happy, just depressed when I think of having to explain this all to people. Maybe I should just hand them the address to this page, so they can try to understand. I don't know.

Either way, I don't want to talk about it.

I've discussed it with Chris, and that's all I need. I'm good now. I 've moved past it, and feel better.

I'll try to upload pix soon.

-B

Got a job

And still hoping for a different one.

Not that I won't like this one, just the other one, that I just applied for, pays almost double.

For 4 on/3 off. Which would be excellent right now, so I could pack, move, clean!

Plus, when we move to Edmonton, I could just transfer to their Edmonton area office... Or however it will work...

Well, with the job I got that starts on wednesday, I get free coffee, and I could easily transfer to one in the city too. I just don't know if the city ones pay as good, or if privately owned ones would do a transfer.

Anyway...

free coffee should have been the biggest hint I could give, but just in case, for those who live here, there is now two of them!

Yeah.

:)

Drove out to Wilkie, SK yesterday(near Battleford, which is the 'old' Battleford. Basically same city, but on the other side of the river, is North Battleford), to visit Chris' parents and kitties... Met the kitties for the first time.

Sigh, I wish I wasn't so freaking allergic to them! Even with antihistamines, (been taking them for about 2 years straight this time), had a reaction, and we ended up staying long enough to go through his BABY PICTURES!!!

Then we went to Battlleford and had dinner @ BP's, and saw the movie 'Fun With Dick and Jane'. It was not really what I was expecting, judging by the previews, but was really good. I give it 4 out of 5 B's. (Don't ask, I don't know!).

Yay! GST check came in! Woot!

Soon, will have job, soon, will pay cell phone bill. Soon, will be able to afford more medication, sort of.

Hopefully, soon, will get the other job I was hoping to get, and will be able to afford to pay some of those nasty things I keep getting in the mail, oh yeah, they're called bills. Hate those things. They are really annoying. Why can't the government just develop some sort of tax that takes off a certain amount of your paycheque, depending on how much you make, and then not bill for essential utilities. Or stop privatizing things!!!!
(Or just kick Direct Energy out of Canada- weren't they kicked out of the states? Why are they allowed here?)

ANYWAY, random acts of bitchiness is over. For now.

Heh heh heh...

I am starting to wonder if Chris and I are going to have to rent a storage place, or if we will be able to fit all of our $#%! in my parents basement... We have thrown out a lot of stuff, and/or recycled what is recyclable, but still!

We seem to be accumulating more, seeing as how a large portion of the stuff we threw out, was stuff we got better handmedowns of.

Brr... I am COLD!!! My hands and feet are always freezing, yet my doc sez I have good circulation! Is this just a woman thing? It is really quite annoying, especially when I have both socks and slippers on, two shirts and a sweater, under a blanket, then still want to turn up the heat... I don't think Chris likes it either. Some nights, I would rather fall asleep on the couch all bundled up, than get up into the frigid air and climb into a cold bed!

I think I am going to go have a hot bath.

Hey, I am thinking of getting my hair cut, and want to try a new style, but can't think of anything to do to my hair. Can anyone suggest any styles you think might be good for me? (Hair is naturally wavy, usually tangly no matter what I do, and I would prefer something low maintenance...)

Any suggestions would be great, emailed photographic examples would be better!

Hope everyone is having a good year so far!

I wonder, should I start a website to detail the dual wedding updates?

I could get one started, and give the two couples the password, so they can update it too...

Hmmm... I have some emailing to do...

Goodnight for now.

Blaine

My Goals for January 2005

I CAN'T SLEEP!!!!!


Well, seeing as how we are planning to move into M&D's for a little while, until we get organized enough to move back to Edmonchuk, at least, I have decided to set some goals for this month.

So far, my plans are:

by Friday, January 20th, 2005 - Be packed
by Wednesday, January 25th, 2005 - Be moved out
by Sunday, January 29th, 2005 - Be done cleaning the whole house
on Tuesday, January 31st, at approximately noon, I want to transfer possession back to landlord.

Obviously, these are just general 'dreamed' goals. But, hey, stranger things have happened.

New Year's Resolutions

I was just thinking...

Has anyone made any New Year's Resolutions?

If so, please feel free to comment, I would love to hear them!

I usually make a few, and they don't last more than a few hours, because I make them so unrealistic, they are doomed to fail.

Maybe I should try something simple, like, keep breathing... or to chew less gum (I rarely chew gum as it is)...

Actually, what I think I would like to try as a New Year's Resolution is to actually do some of the research towards getting my acedemics upgraded, and my post-secondary started.

So here are some goals I will set for myself for 2006, and everyone, feel free to check up on them!

1- Research necessary grades/courses needed to become a kindergarden/elementary school teacher.
2- Find out how to, and start, upgrading classes needed.
3- Ask (and if possible, then do it) my cousin's fiancee if I might be allowed to kind of sit in with her kindergarten class a few days, and ask her about 8 million questions about her experiences with it, including when she went to school and stuff.
4- Ask my cousin, same as above, if I might be able to follow him to one, or some of his classes, as he is going to school to be a High school teacher, and I think I could learn from the experience. Again, if possible, arrange to go!
5- Be more positive, and learn to let go of the little things, and take everything else with a grain of salt or five.
6- Contact a career counsellor of some sort, who can assist me with the figuring out of exactly what I need/want to be able to accomplish some of these goals!
7- Get off my lazy butt and do it.

I have a funny feeling that number 7 will be the hardest, which in turn may or may not screw me over for the rest, but that is okay.

Gotta go now.

Again, feel free to comment.

:)