A pure sense of calm

I am starting to feel a very calm happiness in relation to the wedding, the wedding planning and all of the 'stuff' that still needs to be done.

I keep stumbling across articles that make me feel even better about the wedding we've planned. One is about anti-brides, women who like the idea of marriage and want a wedding, but aren't so keen to be the center of attention for too long. The article can be found here.

While the idea of needing to be convinced to have a wedding seems a bit absurd to me, I am very resistant to having a bachelorette party in any form. That's why we've negotiated a coed barbecue type party. More like a pre-wedding get together to celebrate the impending bigger celebration.

Something like that.

There are a lot of traditions that Chris and I are completely ignoring... We don't have ANY plans to do the garter toss thing. At all. Not negotiable.

Some others include the "groom cannot see the bride before the ceremony". Chris and I will be staying in the same hotel room the night before the wedding. If anyone can keep me calm, it's Chris. It makes sense to me that I should wake up with him on one of the most important days of our lives.

Of course, when I leave to go get my hair done, that will be the last time he will see me until the ceremony, but only because I want the whole hair-done-makeup-done-wedding-dress package to be seen all at once. : )

I am considering throwing a bouquet, when I previously rejected the idea completely. I always felt horrible as a single person being pushed up onto the dance floor, into the spotlight, to try to catch a bouquet. When I told others I wanted to spare similarly shy women from the same fate, it was met with absolute shock, even disgust.

There were a few more ideas I considered to avoid the bouquet tossing issues (I know some of the young single 'ladies' invited rarely act as, um, polite as expected, and anticipate a bitter feud for the bouquet if I toss it away from them.) including just announcing that we would appreciate if they didn't push people out of the way. BUT, I know it's supposed to be all in good fun.

I considered giving the bouquet to someone important, as a symbol of appreciate and to honour them, but I would need about ten bouquets.

The old traditional "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something new" is one I like and want to do: I am superstitious. While I know that Chris and I have a fantastic relationship and it's extremely unlikely that it will change into something unexpected, there's no luck like good luck.

So far, I have some ideas for some of them:

Old: ummm... No idea. I wonder if Mom has any memento's from her wedding that I could borrow? That would cover borrowed, too.

New: The dress, the veil, the shoes, the just about everything around me.

Borrowed: No idea. Mom might have a bracelet she said I could borrow.

Blue: Might take a ribbon from the bouquets I still have from my sister's wedding. Tie it around my bouquet, and presto! Something Blue.

There are some things that I absolutely love the idea of: Like saving my wedding dress for the future. Eventually I hope my daughter would like to wear it.

That's why I can't even fathom doing this.

I can understand the 'thrill' some brides might get out of wearing the dress again, but I would cherish the memories much more, knowing that someday, someone very special to me could wear my dress as her something old.

I would have loved to have worn my Mom's dress, but back when Joy and I were skinny teenagers, neither of us even came close to fitting into it. Then I hit puberty and my hips got way bigger, so even if I lost half my body weight, I doubt I could fit into it.

I've decided that I think making my own bouquets would be more satisfying than having them done. I plan to buy a dozen roses to play with, and then will see how easy or difficult it might be.

I'll post pictures, too. : )